Wednesday, June 11, 2014

"I like you so much I'm gonna take you behind a middle school and get you pregnant."

So, I've been postponing an update for sometime now, because I recently experienced a little negative backlash, like people do when they live openly, and share things online. I have quite a thick skin after so many years of blogging, and because I truly believe that getting upset over something someone has said online is ridiculous.

Anyways, to touch slightly on base it felt like this individual was trying to flame me because I use MFP, and the fact that I still weight myself versus me preaching just being healthy.

I am guilty of using MyFitnessPal-- it has helped me a lot while learning about nutrition. I absolutely do weigh myself from time-to-time, but that varies.

I think sexy happens at any size, I feel great at my current size, but also feel great knowing that I am almost back to the weight I felt my best at. I've worked for that. I am not fat-shaming anyone, because I am still fat. I am just a healthy, fat person (yeah they exist), that happens to be a sexy beast as well.

I do not think of this blog as a 'weight loss blog.' It's not. It may have started that way many, many moons ago. But, things evolve. I evolve. This blog has evolved. This blog is about me. Pure and simple. It's hoopy, and whimsical, and sometimes pure none-sense, but hey, that's me.

Now that we've got that out of the way, I need to sit down, write some goals and start reaching them. Since being back in Oregon I've been dealing with things the best way I know how; one thing at a time. I've been sad off and on, but for the most part things have been wonderful.

Today I wrote the kids a letter, and I was able to babysit for Skye and Keith. I recently found out that I was being under paid at my new store, and I'll be getting back pay very shortly. I've been able to get on Public Assistance, which was needed and I am grateful. I've been biking a lot (in the last week and half I've laid down 85 miles according to Runtastic). My skin is sun-kissed. I look happy and healthy. I've been honest with myself as far as where I am at, I am still dating, and I'm enjoying being single.

I am allowing myself to have silly crushes when appropriate, and brushing off dudes that are douche-bags. I just wanna smile, have a great summer with my friends, occasionally flirt with people, feel good on my own, hoop dance, and set into the rhythm of my new life.

I am happy with writing, taping hoops, working my day job, and being proud of doing things on my own for myself. It's kinda cool realizing my own awesomeness (in a totally non-self-centered sorta way, right?).